Hey, it's just me. And I'm back to school. It is weird trying to get back into the swing of things, but I am so ready to be back! I love seeing my friends and starting my new major and being in leadership! So much to look forward to. However, there is one thing that I am not looking forward to.
MY heart being broken and played with again.
Yeah I know, it is partially my fault for letting that happen to me last year. I am over it! But as we all know, it is way easier to get over something when the situation goes away for a little while. When it is not part of daily life, it is easy to forget. But, in the next few hours, I have to once again build a cement wall around my heart in order to concentrate on myself, my leadership responsibilities, and my major. I just don't wanna have him go and break my heart once again, when it really isn't my fault.
Ugh, so annoying, right? I'm over it but at the same time I don't think I am. I want to be, but when you are in the moment, well... You get what I'm saying, right? Or is that just me?
I know I shouldn't even worry right now. Why get all apprehensive over what is now absolutely nothing? My mom always used to tell me to figure out the present before worrying about the future. But this pit in my stomach I've had since I woke up this morning? Yeah, it ain't helping one bit.
I don't want anything to happen at this point in my life. I guess I just have to stand by that concept and just not let it. Because I feel that if I do let the wall come down too much again, this time it will absolutely be my fault.
But hey, that's just me.
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